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The Lie People Tell You on How to be Happy Everyday

Are you on a personal growth path and feel like you are doing everything “right” but wonder why you are still not happy every day?

Influencers and motivational speakers tell you to do this “one” thing and you too can be happy. If not, then you are not hustling enough.

Stop the madness! For once let’s be real and tell each other that it is 100% ok to not be happy every minute of every day.

It is ok to have a bad day, a day when you are pissed at the world, a day when you are anxious about what is coming next. A day when your bed and pj’s sound better than a 5:30 am workout.

Having those days does not mean you are doing something wrong. It means you are human.

On my happiness journey, I had to learn to say NO. That was really, really hard because I am a people pleaser. I had to heal emotional wounds and untangle myself from toxic relationships. It was (is) really hard work. I had days when no matter how hard I tried, I was not about to Be Happy.

Wikipedia defines happiness, “The term happiness is used in the context of mental or emotional states, including positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. It is also used in the context of life satisfaction, subjective well-being, eudaimonia, flourishing and well-being”.

To understand happiness is to understand that you will not be happy every day.

Yes, happiness is a choice. You choose to get up and go for a run because it will make you feel better in the long run. Yes, you have to choose to eat the bowl of fruit and oatmeal today because it will give you longer-lasting energy. Yes, you have to choose to live by your priorities.

These habits get easier over time, but there will be days when you skip the run. DO NOT BEAT YOURSELF UP. There will be days when a PJ day binge-watching Netflix will bring you comfort, enjoy it.

Recognize that you are doing your best. Bad days and mishaps do not mean you are a bad person. It does not mean that you are not hustling hard enough.

It means that you are human and that yes, even this is part of your Happiness Journey.

What happens if a bad day turns into a bad week?

When you have a cold what do you do? You take all unnecessary activities and tasks off your plate. You cuddle up on the couch with a bowl of chicken noodle soup, Netflix and give your body time to heal.

When we feel blue for more than a day or so, I like to call it an emotional cold. Like a real cold, we draw back to basics and make sure that we are taking care of ourselves. To give ourselves the time and space to feel our feelings and heal.

Below is a list of activities to help increase your happiness. Use what works for you and disregard the rest.

10 Ways to Increase Your Happiness Levels

  1. Get a Good night sleep

  2. Eat proper nutrients

  3. Workout or go for a walk outside

  4. Remind yourself of your purpose, priorities, values, and goals

  5. Look at your calendar and make sure your task list and events align with your priorities and goals

  6. Make time for play and rest

  7. Practice self-care

  8. Spend time with friends and family and avoid toxic people

  9. Heal emotional wounds, journal, or reach out to speak with someone

  10. Define what spirituality means to you

What happens if you are doing everything on this list and you still are not happy?

Life has its seasons, so do you and your emotions. Whatever you do, do not push down the anxiety, fears, and sadness. Put one foot in front of the other, and if it gets to be too much reach out and speak with an affordable therapist or your doctor. You are never alone, you are loved.

You can have a happy life without being happy every day. The most important thing is to love and respect yourself wherever you are.

Your Happiness Action Steps

  1. Make a list of healthy habits and activities that brings you joy and pleasure

  2. Pick one "tiny" habit or activity that you can add to your day

  3. Decide at what point in the day you will implement your changes

  4. Celebrate success

Book Recommendation The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown

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